Telling family, partners and close friends

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I am a Donor

While you may be curious to know more about your donor offspring, you may not have told your partner, family or close friends about your donation, which could complicate your feelings about the issue.
Your family may view future contact as potentially positive which may lead to new friendships and connections for them – or they may be apprehensive about how this may impact on the time they have with you or whether it will change their relationship with you.

Your parents may not understand donor conception and may view this in a negative light or, conversely, may be excited about potential grandchildren, especially if you have not had children. In this case, your parents may struggle if donor offspring do not view them in the same way or feel that you do not have a parental role.

Your children may question your role with your donor offspring. Some may see this as an exciting development and welcome the opportunity to connect with people conceived from your donation (donor-siblings). Others may be concerned this may change their role in the family and do not want to ’share’ you. They may need reassurance that your relationship with your donor offspring is different and the love you have for them will never change.

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Personal Quotes

“I made the decision to make myself available to any offspring if they wanted any information about me. One of those chose to find out more about me after he turned 18. One of the first things he said was thank you for what you did those 18 years ago. That was one thing I didn’t expect but it was very nice… people have asked us about the sort of relationship we now have. There are no words in the English language… we haven’t got words for this yet.” Roger

*This quote was retrieved from the now closed Government organisation VARTA: Victorian Assisted Reproductive Treatment Authority (Closed 2024)

DISCLAIMER: We are a fully volunteer-run organisation. If you find any information on this website you believe is incorrect or needs updating, please let us know at hello@artfam.com.au.

Acknowledgement of Country

ARTFam & ASMBC acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the land on which we live, work, and build our families. We pay our respects to the Elders past and present, and we honour the strength, knowledge, and enduring connection that Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples have to family, community, culture and Country.

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